SEXUAL PRESSURE
Therefore, you and Ahmad are dating for what 2 months now, and you just like him, he's the guy for you, intelligent, funny, passionate and well educated, and yet, you can't stop getting these signals from him wanting sex, but are you ready for this? You didn't even planned for this, but again, you don't want to blow this guy off, or push him away, sex is a need in every one, and it's ok for him to ask for it, or giving you signals, but dealing with it is what matters now, and you don't want to do it and ending up regretting it, you want your first time with him to be special, and it's not just about his needs and breaking your rules for him, it's just isn't right, plus doing it for the wrong reasons too, don't want to mix up things. People think gay people are sex animals, and they go for it whenever there's a chance, but I guess people like to hear the wrong rumor, rushing things isn't good as it might feel in the moment, and you have to get that sexual pressure off your back whenever it faces you:
- Sometimes your guy wants to have sex early, earlier than you're ready for, so having a "sex talk" with him is the best solution for every surviving couple, tell him that you're not ready for this, and when you are, he'll be sure to know.
- When you're kissing, and in the heat of the moment, and you feel this will go further than kissing, excuse him to go to the bathroom, which will break the heat and give you a chance to recapture your grip not going through this. When you come back, tell him kissing is far as you can go now, or "this is I'm comfortable doing."
- Now, if he keeps pressuring you into sex, and get a bit roughly with you, you need to leave him, you don't need someone like him around you, if he's not listening to your needs he's only after one thing, "getting into your pants", you never know what he might do, try one and twice telling him, but if he kept on, the boy have to go.
My Kali's Alert:guys who tell you "if you love me, you'll do it" are the guys who are also want to get into your pants, if the guy likes you, or loves you, he won't pressure you into something you're not ready for, or don't want to, he have to be willing for your comfort, and your needs too, not his.
Are you doing sex for the wrong reasons? Well, you're about to discover this out. Paying attention to these points are very important for building your self-worth, and setting your rules:
To join the club! Having sex is a personal decision, you don't do it to fit in with your friends or group. That way you give people the control of your personal decision. You don't need to have sex so you can tell your friends, or because you're the inexperienced one, it's just not right, again it's a personal decision.
To be his boyfriend! You never do sex to become someone's boyfriend, sex is something you do, or you go for when you already have a bond or a relationship, it's doesn't create one, and it could kill the connection, sex without a bond or feelings will make him see you as a hookup, not a BF.
To save the relationship! A bumpy relationship, is a signal of you're not communicating well, or enough, you need to figure things out, sit down and talk, it's the only way. Sex will add more complications.
To achieve attention! Having sex for attention and getting noticed will make you seem like a slut, and it will make it hard for other guys to see you as a relationship, and BF material, it will set you on the map with a bad reputation, and it will kill your self-worth, and will make you believe that guys think all you're good for is sex. You don't need such an attention!
with the help of seventeen.com