Coming out is the journey the LBTG community takes to leave the darkness, and march into the light. It is dropping all the acts, closing in the curtains on the fake life we once lead; it is taking progressive steps into recognition, and pride. Coming out is essential and might seem like an easy thing to do, it might be a relief, but not all coming out stories are the same.
First before you think of coming out study the environment you live in, start with family, is your family religious? Culture-bounded? Homophobic?
You do not want to defy your family or show them that gay people are aggressive and violent or even mentally unstable by causing a drama and forcing your acceptance. Don’t place them under the current. Talk to them before you even consider coming out, try to know how they feel about people who are different, maybe start with race, then sex, discuss those minor topics then address gay people. If their reaction was extremely cruel, drop the topic and leave the discussion. Give them time to cool off. (Always remember, you don't really have to come out if it’s not bothering you much, because after you come out things will be harder, so good timing is important.)
After a while, talk to them again, maybe start with your siblings if they're old enough to understand, you want show them how being gay isn’t an option (or that it is if you believe so). Try to talk some logic, maybe state some scientific facts, and tell them how it is proven that gay people are much more talented than straight people. Make sure you don’t offend them. Don't come out quickly during the discussion, it's better if they sensed it or asked if you are. That would spare you the awkward position.
Coming out to your family might have its negative and positive sides:
-If they accepted you, they'd understand and be tolerant of whom you are, they'd defend you in front of others and watch your back.
-If your family is homophobic, Coming out might turn bad. And you’ll know the consequences of coming out (in the next step; article in the October issue of My.Kali.mag) so you’ll know what you might face.
Most of teenagers/young people are tolerant of gay people as time progresses. Still, don't trust people whom you haven’t known for a good while now. Some would just wait for you to say something different so they'd use it against you. A lot of gay people were outted against their will by others who had sent E-mails to their families, outted them in college, or at work. Yes, not all people are good!
If you want to come out, you do it, don’t let others do it for you. But the whole concept of coming out, isn’t about telling your family, it could be just one close person whether it’s a friend or teacher, it doesn’t aim for the whole world to know. However, some friends (who aren’t identified as true friends) would judge you and alienate themselves from you. You'd feel rejected and avoided, but its ok, you need to be around people who’ll stand by you in this fragile phase, so don’t pay attention to such downers. If they come to confront you, sit with them, try to explain what homosexuality is to them in an easy language, show them that being gay isn’t wrong and that you’re not so much different. Make sure they know you're proud of who you are.
As for your understanding friends, they will cover you with warmth and would help you at anytime, they'd be a shoulder you can lean on and you can talk to them about your dates(do that step by step! you wouldn't want to scare them, after all, they’re minds don’t get the idea of two men or women in love.)
As coming out in the society, most of us live in Arabic/Islamic societies, coming out aren’t something you would want to do! Some countries have laws against homosexual, and some of these laws include physical punishment such as locking you up, execution or even committing a “felony” as they state!
If you're coming out to your family and friends went smoothly, you really (and I mean really) don't have to go an announce it on an advertising board in mid-city! Keep it low; appreciate the fact that you've had it good with the people whom you care for and care for you. Be an undercover active gay in society, this way you'll do yourself a favor by protecting yourself instead being locked up or injured by some hate crime.
Society has no mercy at times “never forget the tabloids’ lights that was given to that gay magazine that was about to launch in Jordan, or the hate crimes against gays in Iraq, or the continuous executions in Iran. Just watch your back, think with your head. And I know the feeling when being proud of “you” becomes an essential where it’s not accepted in such societies.